New crap in my life:
A very dear friend (even if we do not talk as much as we used to) has gone and done something mind-bogglingly unwise, and even though it does not affect me personally, it still causes me no small amount of pain.
For reasons that I cannot fathom, she decided to "expand" her marriage to include a second man, as the "only" alternative would be to sneak behind her husband's back to have an affair with this second man, whom she also loves. Her husband and father of her two children, unless he goes for threesomes, gains nothing, and the only thing in it for him is that she does not leave, as he would be obligated to provide her with support, as her husband, if she did. The husband's situation is not one that I would wish on my worst enemy.
I can understand the problems of maintaining the promise to "exclude all others". They are called "Married, not dead" moments, when you meet highly desirable people after you have already found a special someone to spend your life with. My wife's youngest sister, if she chooses to employ proper posture, is well into the 'must beat them off with sticks' category of beauty. It would be simpler if I did not notice her figure, but I am married, not dead.
I am wrestling with how to explain to my friend what I think she has done wrong, because I really love her too much to stay silent (even if I now thank my lucky stars that I was never her boyfriend). I suppose I feel guilty, because there was a time when she would have asked my advice, so there is a nagging thought that I might have been able to prevent the situation from ever happening, but we each married other people and lived in different cities.
**sigh**
While there is life, there is hope
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