«

Alright, I've read them all. And after reading them all, I, the Magekind, am going to die.

Yes, that's right. When I am finished with this post, what's-'is, 5th Hossman's-a gonna kill me.

Because I'm going to start out with everybody's favorite: How do I download the game?
...
...
...

Roit. So now we've done some random klikking, we've found - Oh, my patron deity, a .ZIP file called PM2! Agh! Someone get some blood pressure meds. I'm gonna pop.

Yesh.

Now, we have PM2. Now I can't get it to run. We are not going to state the fact that it ran excellently under WinXP, because like all other nOObs, I don't know what an executable file is, remember? I just use .lnk files. Oh, right. They don't know what those are either. Desktop icons. There. Now we're speaking the same language. Almost. I need to work on misspelling things though.

Okay, so I guess I need to find the executable file. That works. It says something like "PM2" on it. and it just shows this window-thingy.

But that's not good enough. I have to get DOSBox. How do I do that, after I've been using it to play OMF2097 for hours on end, in an effort to write a fanfic about OMF? Oh, right, I get it. You have to, like... run the program or something. Yyyeeaahh....

So, we're DOSBoxing happily. A left hook, a quick right jab, step back and come in for... what? Oh, right. "Mount c [your-directory-list-in-eight-letter-steps-here]"

I think I get that. Okay, so now we're playing PM2, and I CHEATED. Sue me. I shouldn't have. I regret it thoroughly. Venus didn't like it anyway. Meh, who cares about the goddess of love? Not me, that's for sure. I've got a fairly good Magic Performer who married an intelligent wizard. Now we play for reals.

A little about myself. I hate simulations. I can't drive, I can't play football, soccer, whatever-it-was-you-were-going-to-suggest-ball. I used to play C&C, but I've lost my taste for that. Now we play Red Faction, UT, Soldier of Fortune, and the like. We also play Tekken and OMF. OMF because it's so freakin' awesome.

Back to PM2. I'm a twisted weirdo. Not a sicko, I like to think I'm fairly normal that way. I tend to play as females when I have the option, but partly because all the gamers around here are guys and nine out of eight of them are playing male characters; so I be different. I also like to be in the action, not pointing-and-clicking the action. So when I downloaded PM2... it might have been the dirty old man thing. But not quite in that way. ...

All in all I'm very pleased with the Game. I regret how Aueniteri(there's a mouthful for you!) turned out, but I swear I will do better with Niamh, who's a fighter by nature. Let's see you get that girl into "high society".

Also, anybody here do anime? Apparently, GAINAX is also the publishers of Petite Princess Yucie, so all you who're dying to play the other games, satisfy yourself by renting the anime DVDs. And please, oh please do not start asking where to get them. I am not going to say "Netflix" once. Okay, maybe not more than once.