19-10-2006, 09:53 AM
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#1411 | ||
   Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Agalli, Albania
Posts: 1,021
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It's annual superheroes new years party. Batman and Spiderman are chatting. All of a sudden the Hulk rushes in all red and perplexed. "Whats up" asked Batman? "Well i was upstairs looking for the toilet and i passed the bedroom and saw Wonder Women naked on the bed and moaning and groaning. I started feeling randy and thought what the hell and jumped on top of her!" "Was she surprised?" asked Spiderman. "Yes but not as surprised as The Invisible Man!" ---- In days of old, when knights were bold, this particular knight was leaving for a crusade and called of his squires: "I'm leaving for the crusade. Here is the key to my wife's chastity belt. If, in 10 years, I haven't returned, you may use the key." The knight sets out on the dusty road, armored from head to toe, and takes one last look at his castle. He sees the squire rushing across the drawbridge, yelling, "Stop! Thank goodness I was able to catch you. This is the WRONG KEY."
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Crantius Colto: Fear not. You are safe here with me. Lifts-Her-Tail: I must finish my cleaning, sir. The mistress will have my head if I do not! Crantius Colto: Cleaning, eh? I have something for you. Here, polish my spear. Lifts-Her-Tail: But it is huge! It could take me all night! Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time. From The Lusty Argonian Maid by Crassius Curio found in TES3: Morrowind |
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19-10-2006, 09:02 PM
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#1412 | ||
  Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: ,
Posts: 4,614
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That king thought he could get away with it... LOL
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Life starts every day anew. Prospects not so good... |
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19-11-2006, 05:35 AM
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#1413 | ||
 Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Lappeenranta, Finland
Posts: 2,236
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This was one of the best joke's i've ever heard. I have never laughed so much!
On the backstage at Hamlet, we (the guys) were talking about Titanic, the movie. One of us mentioned the scene, where the two main characters have sex in a car. I said: "I wonder what they were doing in there" Other one said: "Playing billiards"  |
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19-11-2006, 12:03 PM
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#1414 | ||
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: ,
Posts: 4,614
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Life starts every day anew. Prospects not so good... |
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19-11-2006, 02:47 PM
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#1415 | ||
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Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kaunas, Lithuania
Posts: 1,016
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<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(TheChosen @ Nov 19 2006, 08:35 AM) [snapback]267567[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
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19-11-2006, 09:58 PM
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#1416 | ||
    Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Kelso, Scotland
Posts: 181
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This is a very old one, from back when women commonly called thier undies 'drawers'.
The man says to the slightly deaf old woman : "Winter draws on!" The old woman replies : "No, but i've got the red flanel to make them!" It really is ancient. |
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26-11-2006, 09:54 PM
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#1417 | ||
  Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Zagreb, Croatia
Posts: 1,867
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OK maybe it was posted already but I can't bother to read through the whole topic :P
Body: Cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs rpsoet it.
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[14-12, 16:08] TotalAnarchy: but the greatest crime porn has done is the fact that it's all fake and emotionless, that's why I prefer anime hentai frankly |
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26-11-2006, 10:02 PM
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#1418 | ||
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Shella, Kenya
Posts: 2,570
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Oh, just three or four times...
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26-11-2006, 10:12 PM
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#1419 | ||
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Zagreb, Croatia
Posts: 1,867
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Gah tghout so, wlel tehre's no hram in rpesotnig it tehn?
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[14-12, 16:08] TotalAnarchy: but the greatest crime porn has done is the fact that it's all fake and emotionless, that's why I prefer anime hentai frankly |
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26-11-2006, 10:29 PM
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#1420 | ||
 Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Kavadarci, Macedonia, the former Yugoslav Republic of
Posts: 78
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Fai fui chan chi choh-sei um! ches tai um bla bla ki? ja ja pui oi boi koi toi soi mostovoi? oi oi oi oi pokiju pij bgyrk kjooi...  |
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